Saturday, October 30, 2010

Miss Scarlet in the kitchen with the ketchup

Funeral services will be held at dinner.

Yes, Professor?

I'm not a smart alec.... noooooo.

The latest form of panhandling

Desserts are extra...

Line starts here

Are they expelled because they jumped, or did they jump because they were expelled?

A typical day on the Highway

This is what I do EVERYDAY, don't you?

Cages for children

This inexpensive model is very versatile, you can sit on it, place things on it, and use it as general furniture!


And the congregation yelled "AMEN!!"

Child Labor

Do the dishes, THEN you can have breakfast!

A fate worse than death

"Enslaved by Ducks"

Jamaica gone cannibalistic

Got any for American jerks?

But you see, officer....

You can't really read it, but the back of it says "hookers wanted."

Captain obvious gone wrong

Is it or is it not?

Watch for the Asylum escapees

Crazy man with the monkeys say What?

There's ALWAYS a catch...

The most ironic part of this is that it was the label for a swimsuit. Maybe it's not really irony though, maybe that's their scheme. You take off your clothes and you lose a couple pounds instantly anyway!

The truths we hold dear

Why explain a perfectly understandable thing?

Get yours now!

This headline worries me a little...

I'm telling my mommy on you!

My mommy always told me to finish my vegetables because people in Africa were starving. Are you telling me that now I SHOULDN'T eat? I'm confused

The NEW Orange Juice

This Passover don't forget your orange juice!

College student's Dream

Finals week special: Free Donuts and Scantrons. Because EVERYONE needs a donut with their scantron.. or is it that everyone needs a scantron with their donut? Hmmmmmm

Can I have a 13 ounce?

Any 12 oz size. Nope, sorry not that one.... no, we're out of that one too. Dang it, I said TWELVE ounce! We just add the "any" to make you feel like you have other options.

We pride ourselves in our lack of redundancy.

But that doesn't mean we can't be oxymorons.

Mystery shopper

I'm pretty sure that's not what they mean when they consider you a mystery shopper. However, this is definitely The epitome of assorted... No one ever said they had to tell you what was in the assortment.

Case of the Cone Caper

No I DON'T know where your ice cream cones went. I'm innocent, I swear! You can't prove it... besides, I'm cute!

Sex sells

Oh the art of the double entendre.

Well rounded

Even my CAR thinks it is diverse...

Baffling animals

As opposed to incomplete horse? How did they fit it in the cage? Is it like a MINI-mini horse? So many questions, so few answers.

Ladies man

They're startin' them younger and younger...


I tell you, the gnomes are trying to take over the world! We're all much safer this way.

Special at your local store

I gotta go find a salesperson!

Soakin up the sun

This is what happens when you live in Arizona and don't let the cat out. At least they hid the alcohol! haha

Revenge on the Dentist

Who DOESN'T love a three foot tall cotton candy?

Dream BIG

Someday I'm gonna be a BIG dog and ride around in the back of trucks! (umm, sorry, you'll never get much bigger poor girl)

Baby fashion

Ohhh yeah. Alvin's the man!

Pyros needed

Dangerous question to pose at a popular eating place for the pyro-aged person..

Shopping "how not to"

Nah, this is just our weekly shopping trip! Where's my other cart?

This was a good chunk of the stuff we bought for our trip to Disneyland. There were 2 of us shopping...

No thanks?

Cue the environmentalist complaints....

Reducing expenses

After all, who needs an extra piece of wood layin' around? Where's your sense of adventure!?

US Government 101

'nuff said

Trust me on the sunscreen

Please oh please don't forget the sunscreen. It's painful, trust me. I still have the proof. Can you say perma-tan?

Me no speaky English

Advertising fail... yet again. If it's hands free why are the people on the package using their hands?

Saving money....

And this is how we fit 4 people in one bed. Who needs two hotel rooms?

Parenting young children 101

Parents, feed your children BEFORE they are this tired.... "Sooooo gooooood. I couldn't put it down for anything!"

J.R.R. Tolkien in Vegas

Watch for moving trees.... Walk soft and speak sloooooooowly.

4th of July Awesomeness

Oh yeah, that's right. We rock. Kenneth's number for the 4th of July parade was 42. He drove his Willys towing his teeny two (airplane) on the trailer. We were pretty much the awesomest entry in the whole thing.

Go away.

I can't.... quite.... make... ah heck. Go away, I'm taking a nap.


So if you go topless you can go more often? more miles? or is this a driver-specific thing as in you can get further with the driver? hmmmmmmm..... Greyhound, not your best advertising scheme. hehe


I have a dream that one day all things will be profitable in educating a society.... Or maybe I just have to giggle at the thought of having a vending machine with books and toys in it. Geniusness!!


MY favorite spin on an old childhood classic.

Picky picky

Does this mean all the garbage from your passenger seat floor that has piled up? Or maybe the unwanted passengers?

The Five seasons of Victoria

Could someone please explain this to me? I've always learned there were FOUR seasons. What's the other one called? Sprallintumer?